The Shivering

Two themes that we discussed on Wednesday that I think is seen again in "The Shivering" is personal growth and being heard, and I think in this chapter these two go hand in hand.

Although it takes two unfortunate events in Nigeria to bring two strangers, Ukamaka and Chinedu, together to form a friendship, it seems to be exactly what they both need. As the story within the chapter develops, it is clear to see how these two evolve from friendly strangers to close friends, and it is important to note how through each other they are able to also grow in a personal way.  Initially they develop a friendship based solely on the fact that they are both Nigerian and can relate during a time of pain and confusion for their country, but it turns out to be much more than that.  Ukamaka recently had her heart broken by a guy that she had built her life around, and Chinedu listens to her vent endlessly about the relationship that she had.  This is what Ukamaka needs because she had never had the ability or the opportunity to talk so openly or to be heard in her relationship with her ex.  Chinedu brings to her attention that she should examine her feelings more closely, and he explains that he had been in a similar relationship back home.  This allows Ukamaka to not only be heard but to also listen to someone else and gain another's point of view, which helps her develop a new perspective about her broken relationship.  You can see this realization when Ukamaka says, "How can a person claim to love you and yet want you to do things that suit only them? Udenna was like that" (Adichie 161).  Chinedu, much to Ukamaka's surprise, questions whether or not Udenna, her ex, ever even loved her at all.  Although offended, this is the moment where I think Ukamaka is most changed. She understands that Udenna's behavior did not make any sense, but she wanted him to love her so badly that she was blinded by his offensive actions.  Chinedu's words cut deep into Ukamaka, but he is heard. Therefore, she does not hold a grudge against him and insists that he talks to her.  Ukamaka learns that Chinedu is not even a student at Princeton, and she just staying with a friend while anxiously waiting to get a deportation notice.  I think that Chinedu leans on Ukamaka for support through their friendship even without disclosing this information at first.  They both develop personal growth by hearing each other's different points of view and supporting each other regardless of any differences.